By Fiona Kelliher. Powered in part by the tech world’s appreciation for avoiding unpleasant tasks or wasting time, plus a regional concentration of wealth and online dating fatigue, elite matchmaking has cemented itself as a small but thriving industry in the Bay Area. You can probably name half a dozen ride-sharing and food-delivery services off the top of your head. And even if you scoff at those who use them, you’ve probably heard of companies for outsourcing laundry pickup, dog walking, clothes shopping and plant buying. But there’s one service hardly anyone will admit they’re paying for, even as it empties their pockets, shapes the way they dress and perhaps even who they marry: high-end matchmaking. And while the sky-high cost — ranging up to hundreds of thousands of dollars — is prohibitive, clients have to do more than just pay.
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Some forums can only be seen by registered members. I am considering relocating to SV from Texas. Please share any thoughts or experiences about how easy it is to make friends, and how open that San Jose is to newcomers. Also, what are your thoughts regarding the dating prospects for a 32 year old single white female, who has no children, but has an advanced degree? I realize that similar posts may exist, but my demographics may be unique or at least they are in Texas.
Find like minded people, who enjoy similar things that you do and you can make friends.
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I arrived on the singles scene in with an aching heart and a lot to learn. Seemingly overnight, dating apps had shifted from the desperate domain of the overs to the new normal. Every man and his dog were on Tinder — or every man and his sedated tiger, all dumb grins and flexed muscles bulging out of Bintang singlets. Initially hesitant, I got into the swing of it soon enough; window-shopping for boys from the comfort of your couch sure has its benefits, and amongst the beefed-up bodybuilders and BDSM buffs, there seemed to be a few potential suitors.
After all, I have a clean record, wide smile and impeccable hygiene. The reality was rife with rejection. I met men who seemed keen but never texted again; men who only wanted sex; men who were rude to waiters red flag ; men who flirted with waiters double red flag. It was perhaps the most profound two words ever uttered to me online: app fatigue. My editor has challenged me to delete the apps and look for love offline.
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No one seems to really want a relationship or is already in a relationship. No one seems to really want kids. I’m from the area and don’t plan on leaving, but I’m not sure how many other people want to settle down here.
Many have bemoaned the dating scene for women in New York City over 6, San Jose, California, , $, $38,, , ,
But more on that in a minute. We can almost hear the throaty roar of Greyhound buses packed with starry-eyed women from across the country pulling into downtown San Jose. In any case, to hear the guys tell it, an Oprah-inspired infusion of lady-passion is sorely needed. Said K. The effect of all of this for a single guy is one of massive frustration. All of my male friends, especially the ones over the age of 30, feel the same way. They also tend to have a variety of emotional issues.
Or they are super busy and stuck on themselves. I discourage them from moving here because they will find it very difficult to meet women and date. I love to cook, watch the sunsets with a glass or two of wine, hiking, reading, etc. By Bay Area News Group. Report an error Policies and Standards Contact Us. More in News.
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There is saying amongst women trying to date in Silicon Valley: The odds are good, but the goods are odd. There are tons of guys, but they tend to be socially awkward, career-obsessed, and prone to a Peter Pan mentality. What’s it like to try to find love in the Valley? This lawyer, in her early thirties and living in the heart of Silicon Valley, has tried everything: online dating, going to clubs, and even Linx Dating, a high-end Valley matchmaking service.
On the condition of anonymity she agreed to tell all. They call it “Man Jose,” and it is so true. If you are even an average or above average female, finding a date isn’t an issue. You have a lot of guys you can go on dates with, but what makes it difficult is finding a viable partner. Most of the men went to Ivy League schools, are ambitious, and came out here because it’s the mecca of the tech world. There’s a great mix of guys from all over world, and there are interesting types of people to meet.
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The singles of Silicon Valley, the heart of America’s technological ambition, spend much of their lives in quiet devotion to the power of the almighty algorithm, driven by belief that technology can solve the world’s most troubling ills. But when it comes to the algorithms of love, many say they are losing faith. They wonder whether the valley – a place infamously inhospitable to romance and with the most lopsided gender imbalance in the country – has proven too vexing for even its own dating apps.
But they’re also left with a more fundamental doubt: Maybe the human mysteries of chemistry and attraction aren’t problems big data can solve. One thing distinguishes the Silicon Valley dating pool: The men-to-women ratio for employed, young singles in the San Jose metro area is higher here than any other major area. That ratio permeates the economy here, all the way to the valley’s biggest employers, which have struggled for years to bring more women into their ranks.
Men make up about 70 per cent of the workforces of Apple, Facebook, and Google, company filings show. The companies are also so big that different departments, with differing gender balances, barely mix. Women here say they feel outnumbered, overworked and underwhelmed by the tech industry’s egos and eccentricities: A koan of the local dating scene is, “The odds are good, but the goods are odd.
Men, in return, say they feel outmatched or overlooked. A year-old San Francisco tech entrepreneur who’s given up on dating apps said, “I have a higher confidence in making another million dollars than I do in finding a spouse. But it’s unclear how successful those apps are for life-long romance: Among couples who had been together for five years or less, 88 per cent said they had met their partner offline – no dating app required.
But the area’s gender imbalance has dampened even the act of finding a match.
Is Silicon Valley the Best Place to Be a Single Woman in America?
The crowd at Nola’s bar, six deep with techies not an hour before, had thinned to little clusters of buddies fixated on the Sports Channel. Debbie Giacomo and her three friends, perched on too-tall stools around a table, felt wasted, and not from their warm Anchor Steam pale ales. Giacomo, a year-old third-grade teacher in nearby Hayward, surveying the remaining, idling men.
Try downtown Los Gatos, downtown Campbell, Mountain View and generally just anywhere but San Jose. The best singles scene in the SFBA.
Photographs by Felipe Buitrago Man Jose Is San Jose really one big sausage party, or is the ‘bachelor capital of the world’ tag that’s been slapped on this area just a cruel myth? By William Dean Hinton I F YOU HAD to say exactly when the South Bay dating scene went wrong for the average bachelor, you’d be smart to go with the mids, when, for reasons obvious to nearly everyone living here today, the total number of male residents began to exceed the number of females.
By , the number had flip-flopped. Fourteen thousand more males than females lived in San Jose. Now, for a population of ,, that isn’t a huge difference. Not in an area where women outnumber men in adjacent counties. Yet in the minds of many, this is the millennium of Man Jose. If you relied mainly only on barroom conversations, where things tend to be exaggerated for effect, you’d think it was impossible for the two sexes to ever connect south of Woodside.
It is common to hear the city’s male population compared with Alaska, which allegedly has a 6-to-1 ratio, men to women. In fact, Alaska leads all states with 1.